This summer

This summer is really hard. 

Harder than I ever thought.

This summer is really hot.

Hotter than I ever had.

It is a dragon year which I already knew that something special would happen.

But I never knew that it was such a sorrow.

I know that somewhere we are all towards the end.  I just can’t hold it and find it is almost impossible to endure.

People say we humans always do three things.
“We long for love.
We wish we had more times.
We fear death.”

Till of today, I still can’t go back those days and I don’t understand how come it was this result.

Emotionally I want to dig into every details of the medical processes.
Rationally I understand there are things beyond. There are circumstances where exceeds doctors.

Every tiny thing or a sudden moment, tears burn to eyes.  I just wish you were still there and I could do more for you.

People comfort you by saying you’ve done very well and you’ve tried your best.  No, I don’t think so and I just don’t care about this.

I want you still be there and I want you to have more times with us and I want to see you every time while I come to see you at the old house that I used to live with you in my teenage.

This summer is really too hot.