writer作者：Nile Cappello

cast演播：underage未成年吖

translater译者：underage

THE GIRL IN THE PICTURE

相中女郎

NO ONE KNEW HER NAME OR WHAT HAD HAPPENED TO HER. HER GRAVESTONE READ “GONE, BUT NOT FORGOTTEN”—A HOPE MORE THAN A DESCRIPTION.

没有人知道她的名字或她遭遇了什么。她的墓碑上写着 "消失，但没有被遗忘"——这是一种希望，而不是一种描述。

Cathy Terkanian’s life story seems ripped from the plot of a made-for-TV movie. Her mother, Shirley, had six children with three men. Terkanian’s stepfather was in the Navy, and the family moved seven times before she started the seventh grade. The stepfather was deployed for long stretches, and Terkanian’s mother was overwhelmed by the demands of taking care of so many kids, including one who had epilepsy. With no one looking after her, Terkanian was molested at the age of ten by the husband of one of her mother’s friends, then raped at twelve by a teenager. She knew she had to escape her existence, so she started to make a plan.
Cathy Terkanian的生活像电影一样精彩。她的母亲Shirley与三个男人生了六个孩子。Terkanian的继父是一名海军。在她读七年级之前，举家搬迁七次。继父长期部署，Terkanian的母亲疲于照顾这么多孩子，其中一个患有癫痫。疏于照顾，10岁时Terkanian被母亲一个朋友的丈夫猥/亵，在12岁时又被一个少年强/奸。她知道她必须逃离现在的生活，所以她开始制定计划。

In 1972, Terkanian left Virginia, where her family was living at the time, with no clothes except what she was wearing and without saying goodbye. She was 14 and had no money. She hitchhiked to Tennessee, where she met up with a friend in Memphis, and then went to the city’s Greyhound bus station. She didn’t have a destination in mind, but noticed another traveler wearing colorful beads who mentioned a party down in New Orleans called Mardi Gras. The next day, Terkanian arrived in the Big Easy, where jazz music reverberated through the French Quarter and people laughed and sang jubilantly in the streets.
1972年，Terkanian离开了她在弗吉尼亚州的家，除了身上的衣服，她什么也没带，也没说再见。当时她14岁，两手空空，搭车到田纳西，在孟菲斯与一个朋友会合，然后去了该市的灰狗巴士站。她没有目的地，但注意到另一个戴着彩珠的旅行者，他提到在新奥尔良有一个叫做狂欢节的聚会。第二天，Terkanian来到了 "大易"，那里的爵士乐在法国区巡演，人们载歌载舞。

In the midst of the counterculture movement of the 1970s, Terkanian wasn’t the only runaway teen in New Orleans. She met a network of young people who helped each other out, offering a place to crash, a job, and tips and tricks for staying off the street. Through this group she met Randy Badger, a 19-year-old who’d recently hitchhiked to Louisiana from Los Angeles. Before long they found a place to stay and were doing everything together. They even got joint work at a circus sideshow. For the first time, Terkanian was living her life how she wanted to.
20世纪70年代的反文化运动中，Terkanian安并不是新奥尔良唯一离家出走的青少年。她看到一个年轻人网络，那里的人互相帮助，提供住宿、工作以及不流浪街头的技巧。通过这个团体，她遇到了Randy Badger，一个近期从洛杉矶搭车到路易斯安那的19岁少年。不久，他们找到了住处，并一起共事。他们甚至在马戏团从事杂耍。Terkanian第一次过上了她想要的生活。

In December 1972, Terkanian and Badger traveled to South Carolina, where it was legal for a minor to get married if they had parental permission. Terkanian’s parents gave it gladly—in fact, they insisted on the union. Shirley didn’t want to be the person police called if her daughter was in trouble. Terkanian’s stepfather signed the necessary paperwork.
1972年12月，Terkanian和Badger来到南卡罗来纳，在那里，如父母同意，未成年人结婚是合法的。Terkanian的父母欣然同意——事实上，他们坚持要在一起。Shirley不希望在女儿遇到麻烦时被警察叫去。Terkanian的继父签署了需要的手续。

The couple were married less than a year when Terkanian found out she was pregnant. It was unexpected news, but also another step toward independence. Terkanian wanted to do better by her baby than her mother had done by her. On June 23, 1974, Terkanian gave birth to a healthy daughter. She named her Alexis, after the actress Alexis Smith.
他们结婚不到一年，Terkanian就发现自己怀孕了。这个意外，也是她迈向独立的另一步。Terkanian希望她对孩子比她母亲对她更好。1974年6月23日，Terkanian生下了一个健康的女儿，取名Alexis，以女演员Alexis Smith命名。

Her relationship with Badger soon went downhill. While Terkanian balanced work with caring for Alexis, her husband seemed more interested in partying with friends, including other women. The final straw came when Alexis was five months old: Terkanian returned home from a shift to find Badger kissing another woman on the couch, while Alexis was alone in the back room, crying, without a diaper on. Terkanian decided to leave, but she had to think about Alexis, too. What would be best for her daughter? Terkanian resigned herself to what she considered her only option. She went home to Virginia.
她与Badger的关系逐渐恶化。当Terkanian平衡工作和照顾亚Alexis时，丈夫却在狐朋狗友和脂粉堆里鬼混。Alexis五个月大的时，最后一根稻草倒了。Terkanian下班回家，发现Badger在沙发上亲吻另一个女人，而Alexis光着屁股独自在里屋哭泣。Terkanian决定离开，但她得为Alexis考虑。该拿女儿怎么办？Terkanian认命了，她认为回到弗吉尼亚州的家是唯一的出路。

During the five-day Greyhound ride, Alexis barely cried. Passengers complimented Terkanian, welcome encouragement for the now single teen mom. But whatever confidence Terkanian felt vanished when she arrived in Norfolk and her mother picked her up at the station. Shirley didn’t throw her arms around her daughter or plant kisses on Alexis’s plump cheeks. Instead, she looked the pair up and down and puckered her face in judgement.
五天的灰狗旅途中，Alexis几乎没哭过。乘客们称赞Terkanian，这对单身少女妈妈来说是一种鼓励。但当她到达诺福克，母亲在车站接她时，Terkanian的所有信心都消失了。Shirley没有拥抱女儿，也没有亲吻Alexis丰满的脸颊。相反，她上下打量着这对母女，皱起脸来评判。

It turned out that Shirley had been diagnosed with breast cancer and given just five years to live. Terkanian quickly realized that her mother expected her to care for her siblings. And while Shirley never said it outright, it was clear she didn’t think Terkanian should have a child of her own. One day, casually, Shirley said, “You ran out of formula. How are you gonna take care of this kid?” A seed was planted, and from it Terkanian’s doubt grew. She increasingly felt like she couldn’t give Alexis the life her daughter deserved.
原来，Shirley被诊断出乳腺癌，只剩五年寿命。Terkanian很快意识到，母亲希望她能照顾她的兄弟姐妹。虽然Shirley从未直言，但很明显她不认为Terkanian应该生下Alexis。某天，Shirley随口说："奶粉吃完了，你要怎么照顾这个孩子？"一颗种子被种下，Terkanian的疑虑由此滋生。她越来越觉得自己无法给Alexis提供应她有的生活。

Terkanian agreed to give her baby up for adoption. Shirley handled the logistics, assuring Terkanian that Alexis would be taken in by a good family through Catholic Charities. Shortly after the adoption was finalized, Terkanian left home again. This time, the teenager hoped, things would be different.
Terkanian同意将孩子送养。Shirley善后，向Terkanian保证Alexis会通过天主教慈善机构送去好人家收养。收养手续完成后不久，Terkanian再次离家。这一次，她希望事情会有所不同。